Right now I just don’t have enough positivity and fun and good things in my life to offset the constant (sometimes self-imposed) disappointments I’m experiencing and it’s just really wearing me down and diminishing my whole being into nothingness. It’s going to be a big undertaking to restore me to my former self who had reasons for living.
Having tried so many avenues, I really wonder if it’s ever going to happen. Hopelessness is incredibly joyless and comfortless.