Black Friday traditionally death by stampede.
Working retail in December causes PTSD.
Did Jesus ever have birthday parties?
Sitting on Santa’s lap is disturbing.
Where the hell did I park?
Dads wearing Santa costumes are fruitcakes.
Siblings secretly count gifts ensuring fairness.
Who can rationalize the fruitcake concept?
Christmas birthdays are cruel; blame parents.
Christmas card photos reveal disastrous effort.
Office parties+alcohol+mistletoe: inevitably regrettable.
High-limit credit cards are evil.
Amazon boxes collapsed my front porch.
Yes I really need more stuff.
Why wait until December for eggnog?
Christmas: chaos, clutter, confusion, complications, complaining.
Christmas: calm, contentment, cheer, cozy, comfort.
Give. Then give more. Keep giving.
It’s OK to spend Christmas alone.
Why Caroling in below zero temperatures?
Just make the best of it.
Be merry, be mindful, be mellow.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!